Denied Adoption, I Took a Dark Path

Kiki: Grunge era fashion victim
with stray dog in Puerto Rico.

Even in the 90's, tough adoption standards made me skirt ethics.

I must confess that when I tried to adopt my first 2 dogs from Arizona shelters I was soundly rejected both times.  Granted, I was in my early twenties and had dyed my hair black at the time, so it’s possible the staff thought I had priorities other than being a dog baby mom, but I was happily involved with an animal rights organization, worked in a doggy daycare/boarding facility and had grown up not only with dogs, but with an amazing variety of animals, some of which were brought to us by neighbors because they were sick, lost or injured.  I considered myself rather a catch when it came to animal companionship.  And yet here I was being told an apartment was inappropriate for the dog.  So my chosen baby was returned to her 4x4 prison cell until someone with a palatial mansion happened by and wanted her.  It made me terribly sad and made little sense.

Pop and the pooch.  A teensy bit of mis-
representation with the best of intentions.

So I sent my Marine father in to adopt her.  He was a very noble, law abiding guy, but like John Wayne, happily broke rules that were unjust or just plain silly.  He walked out of the shelter carrying my Joey like a baby.  Drill sergeants look so cute with puppies.

Turns out a dog will do alright in an apartment if you walk them, make sure all their needs are met, and love, love, love them.

Then came Elli.  I went to a different shelter to adopt her.  By now I had moved into a house with a fenced yard.  The shelter where Elli resided would be happy to know this, but since I was kind of a doggy kidnapper on the lam, I did not report that I had changed from an apartment and could now better accommodate a dog, nor did I indicate that I had ever set foot in a shelter for any reason ever.  I presented as a fresh faced ingénue about to embark on her first adventure into dog adoption because I was utterly paranoid. What if they found out about me and confiscated Joey!?  I lied about having another dog because I could feel the heat, if you know what I mean, but my confidence that I was no longer in an apartment emboldened me.  When I told them proudly about my beautiful grassy yard, they asked how tall the fence was.  At the time this threw me for a bit of a loop.  Was it a trick? I hesitated then told them it was about 4 feet.  Surely this was an acceptable height. 

Joey and Elli.  They are no longer with me,
but I will love them forever.

I was rejected yet again.  I don’t think they had an actual buzzer or that “Wah, waaaaah” sound to accompany my humiliation, but I didn’t let it deter me.  I looked into Elli’s eyes and silently promised her that while I was going to walk away, a quiet man with a crew cut was coming back for her very, very soon.

The funny part is, when my dear dad went to adopt Elli, a boxer mix puppy with tiny little feet, they were filming a promotional video for the shelter.  They filmed the whole adoption process with my dad, the dog rescue equivalent of the guy under-aged kids pay to go into a convenience store to buy them beer.  He carried little Elli out much like he had carried Joey, her little paws clutching his strong neck.  Well now they could absolutely and without question ID our illicit adoption scam ring.  I remember when he brought her to my house I was waiting anxiously on the porch.  He walked up to me and handed over the warm little bundle.  I thanked him profusely and we

Elli: Little dog, big attitude.

laughed a bit, as criminals tend to do when they get away with it.  As he walked away, back to his International Scout (an SUV before SUVs) she watched him go with a sad expression.

My dad didn’t live too much longer after that.  She turned out to be a tough guy just like him.

Turns out that in reality, my fence was a perfectly fine height.  Luckily the two puppies got along splendidly – which was truly a relief because that part of the plan was left entirely to fate, my biggest potential error in the whole adoption.

Joey and Elli in their couch potato golden years.

Joey and Elli lived 14 more years each, passing away within less than a year of one another.  The silence of a home once occupied by dogs that is suddenly bereft of their joyful noise is deafening.

They were my buddies and I know I made mistakes with them along the way...starting with their improper adoption, but they had a lot of love, a lot of fun, and a little gas sometimes.  I hope I am lucky enough to always have a couple of dogs kicking me in the abdomen while I'm sleeping.  I think if I have to go into assisted living I will just ask to be boarded at a dog kennel.

There are times when the standards are so high for adopting animals that very good people are weeded out.  It's a loss for the animal, the potential adopter, as well as the shelter.  So many of them are underfunded and full to capacity.  The staff in many of these places are volunteers or employees who are probably overworked and underpaid, but are called to save animals and do it with passion. Should they relax their standards?  I don't think so - not at all.  I will gladly abide home visits and lengthy applications because I know that this process makes it more likely that animals are going to people who will treat them properly - hopefully like family.  Urine samples?  Yes.  Need some blood?  Fine.

Joey's toddler years.  Playing with an orange.

I have read of people outraged that they were rejected, who then turned to a breeder or
pet shop to purchase a dog or other animal.  It is in every way a tragedy.  It saddens me deeply and it's a flaw in our system, but I truly cannot think of a better way to screen adopters.  I wish there was a scanner that could be swept over a person to instantly reveal their character in a tidy printout. Are there overzealous rescuers who are jaded enough that they make it impossible for loving adopters to walk away with an animal in need? Of course, but we can't risk the alternative of handing over animals with little more than the a hope they'll be safe.

-Kiki Nusbaumer